Tuesday 28 May 2013

I Appear Missing - Queens of the Stone Age

This is a long one I'm afraid but please try to make it through! So far we've examined songs released as early as 1967 and as recently as earlier this year (2013). But for this post I'm going to break new ground and discuss a song that hasn't even officially been released yet! I Appear Missing will be released as a track on the new Queens of the Stone Age album (.... Like Clockwork) on June 4th. However, the album got leaked and the band decided to officially release a number of the promo vids to the public. The video is only 3 minutes long but you don't have to wait for the album to hear the full 6+ minute version - the live version is already out there!

1. Calling all comas,
prisoner on the loose,
description:
The spitting image of me,
Accept for the heart shaped hole where the hope runs out

2. Shock me awake, tear me apart
Penned like a note in a hospital gown
A prison of sleep, deeper down
The rabbit hole never to be found
Again… 

3. Where are you hiding my love?
Cast off like a stone
Feelings, raw & exposed when I’m outta control
Pieces were stolen from me or dare I say given away
Watching the water give in as I go down the drain
I appear missing now
I go missing, no longer exist
Some day, I hope, I’m someone you’d miss

Shock me awake, tear me apart
Penned like a note in a hospital gown
The deeper I sleep, further down
The rabbit hole never to be found
Its only falling in love because you hit the ground

4. Dancing on wire both ends are on fire
Cut me loose
Nowhere to run, no more room to pretend
Wandering along the road in the summer night
I go missing, no longer exist
One day I hope I'm someone you'd miss
Shock me awake, tear me apart
Penned like a note on a hospital gown
The deeper I sleep, further down
The rabbit hole never to be found

5. Don’t cry—
With my toes on the edge it’s such a lovely view…
Inside—
I never loved anything until I loved you
Confide—
I’m over the edge, what can I do?
Sunshine—
I’ve fallen through…
I appear missing.

First of all it seems obvious to me that Josh was inspired to write this song by his near death experience after surgery complications in 2010. His heart stopped and had to be defibrillated. He was bed bound for 3 months which caused him to rethink much of his world view and personal priorities. He himself has said that the experience influenced much of the material that subsequently evolved into ...Like Clockwork.

Josh's near death experience was a wake-up call for him but shouldn't we be able to cultivate that balance, self-awakening and structure our life's priorities without a traumatic event of that magnitude? Of course we can !

Its known in Zen as Kensho and it means to experience an initial insight and an understanding of your true Buddha nature. The purpose of Zen techniques is to encourage Kensho at all moments, in order to bask in Satori - enlightenment. Two main techniques used in Zen are zazen (literally sitting) and koans (riddles). The moment of clarity when you solve a riddle, or crossword, or puzzle gives you the smallest hint of what Kensho feels like. More to come on zazen, in later posts - because for me, the title of this song is a koan. By the end of this post I hope "I Appear Missing" might mean something more than it did at the start !

1. The first verse reads like the transcript from police radio. In this case, the "coma police" who patrol us all and keep us imprisoned, dumb-downed and asleep. Once you begin to walk the path and have your first wake-up call (Kensho) you become "a prisoner on the loose". The prisoner has not yet escaped but he is on the run and has the potential to enjoy total realization.
Kongo Roshi: "in Zen the idea is to rise from the dead each moment. Most of us in our everyday waking lives are at least half asleep. Each moment of our lives we must wake up, wake up, wake up! This is the Zen idea. This is the Zen goal. Zen is a philosophy of the here and now, not the then and there. This moment contains everything" 
Daubed in his blood, the protagonist in the video has "WAKE UP" written on his shirt . . . 

2. Your first Kensho can be as violent as being shocked awake, and as we have already touched-on in earlier posts it can be a seriously disturbing experience. Your ego will howl and whine - feel torn apart. Worse still - as the Kensho fades - you fall back to sleep and you yearn to return to that moment of ecstatic harmony. When you can't return to that place through force of will you can feel even further away, never to be found, down the rabbit hole. And as soon as anyone mentions a rabbit hole we have to reference Lewis Carroll and his Alice stories, particularly Alice's Adventures in Wonderland. These so-called children's stories are great works of occult literature. Its not my place to rehash what other great scholar's have already analysed but see here for an easy initial trip down the rabbit hole that is Alice's Adventures in Wonderland. And here for something much more in depth.

3. The ego is in a real bind now. It yearns to return to the source and be reconnected but it also suspects that satori will be accompanied by a withering to nothing of the ego. It drains away and the "I" that used to be so familiar is now missing - its not there anymore. But the yearning to be "someone you'd miss" it still there - satori has not been found. We'll need many more posts to tackle this thorny issue - but all along the path the ego only "appears" to be "missing". A clue for now will suffice - many schools of buddhism actually frown on those who achieve buddhahood - becoming a boddhisattva is the best outcome until all souls are freed.

The last lines of the 3 minute version of song come in the form of "Its only falling in love because you hit the ground". Yearning, craving (see Between Angels and Insects post ) can only end in pain and tragedy.

4.  Time is now running out, the dance cannot continue forever. I love the lyrics here portraying impending catastrophe and a high-wire balancing act - so true to real life! Then BANG - it happens again: Kensho. It can happen anytime, anywhere - this time on a summer night's wander. But the yearning to be missed by you remains and back down the rabbit hole I go. “Who in the world am I? Ah, that's the great puzzle.” Alice to the White Rabbit

5. And here for me, is the sucker punch - the experience of waking-up is one that fills you full of love and compassion for all things. It makes it even harder to let go. The ego is playing a different role, a more subtle game and one that few people ever even notice. But our protagonist here, in this case takes the metaphorical leap, leaves it all behind and experiences the bliss (the sunshine). Something that Josh explicitly outlines earlier in the album with the refreshingly direct song, titled, "My God is the Sun"- perhaps a post on that another day . . .

But needless to say after all that - I Appear Missing


Monday 20 May 2013

Strawberry Fields Forever - The Beatles

Afternoon All ! I hope all is well with you on this fine day. I'm in New York for a few days which is always good news. Its a town full of fond memories and pervaded with an enthusiasm for life that is quite infectious - on top of that my brother now lives here so I always have an excuse to come and visit in the future! Travelling here from the UK also, inevitably, means a little bit of jet-lag. That meant that I found myself taking a stroll through Central Park in the early morning mist at 6am this morning. I was walking with a clear head, the morning chorus ringing in my ears when I found myself in Strawberry Fields.

So no prizes for guessing which song I was inspired to look at today ! Strawberry Fields Forever was released by The Beatles in 1967. Being a child of the '80s I've never been into The Beatles, and have never really understood why they were so HUGE. I originally liked this song because of this - taste is in the eye of the beholder when you're 13 yrs old ! But to be fair, the Candyflip cover does capture the psychedelic origins of the song. Lyrically, the song is quite trippy but the cosmic consciousness that John Lennon was experiencing through his use of LSD and practice of transcendental meditation is explicit:

Let me take you down
1. 'Cause I'm going to Strawberry Fields
2. Nothing is real
3. And nothing to get hung about
4. Strawberry Fields forever

5. Living is easy with eyes closed
Misunderstanding all you see
It's getting hard to be someone
But it all works out
It doesn't matter much to me

Let me take you down
'Cause I'm going to Strawberry Fields
Nothing is real
And nothing to get hung about
Strawberry Fields forever

6. No one I think is in my tree
I mean it must be high or low
That is you know you can't tune it
But it's all right
That is I think it's not too bad

Let me take you down
'Cause I'm going to Strawberry Fields
Nothing is real
And nothing to get hung about
Strawberry Fields forever

7. Always know sometimes it's me
But you know I know when it's a dream
I think I know I mean a "Yes"
But it's all wrong
That is I think I disagree

Let me take you down
'Cause I'm going to Strawberry Fields
Nothing is real
And nothing to get hung about
Strawberry Fields forever
Strawberry Fields forever
Strawberry Fields forever


1. Strawberry Fields in Central Park, NY is named after the song and is a two acre site in west central park adjacent to John Lennon's apartment building, where he was shot dead in 1980. The song was so named, in memory of the location of a Salvation Army children's home in Liverpool, England. As a child, John used to go and listen to the Salvation Army band there, as well as playing with his friends in the woods at the bottom of the garden.
2. Memories of these times are not real, our perceptions are not real and if all we experience is our perceptions then nothing is real (this video is a must-watch on the implications of optical illusions) but that does not undermine the importance of the events of our lives
3. So maintain a healthy perspective - its very difficult to know when something is actually good or bad
4. A wish to return to the playful happiness of childhood - Matthew ch. 18 v 3: Jesus said, “Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven"

5. Walking through life accepting the modern paradigm is the easy route. Taking the road less travelled is tougher but with the right attitude it all works out ok in the end.

6. To be "out of your tree" means to be crazy, deranged, intoxicated. John is concerned that nobody else sees the world the way he does. The overwhelming experience of cosmic consciousness makes it very difficult to dial back in to the "normal" world view. Once again however, this isn't something to get overly upset about "whatever will be, will be"

7. I'm struggling with this last verse. Maybe an update when I've figured it out !!
UPDATE!:
Feelings of universal love and interconnectedness naturally lead to a weakening of personal egocentric identity - but despite that John is asking to still be recognised as his own unique manifestation of spirit.
His ego believes it can tell the difference between a dream and reality.
Descartes' conclusion ("I think therefore I am") is the ground of this belief.
But John's higher self knows this is not a watertight proof - and ultimately John recognises he can never tell what is real or what is a dream.
"Once upon a time, I, Chuang Chou, dreamt I was a butterfly, fluttering hither and thither, to all intents and purposes a butterfly. I was conscious only of my happiness as a butterfly, unaware that I was Chou. Soon I awaked, and there I was, veritably myself again. Now I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was a butterfly, or whether I am now a butterfly, dreaming I am a man. Between a man and a butterfly there is necessarily a distinction. The transition is called the transformation of material things. " Chuang Tzu

Friday 17 May 2013

Iris - Goo Goo Dolls

Happy Friday tout le monde ! An extra post this week as I have a little time on my hands and I try to post when I'm really feeling a particular song. In recent days I've had cause to think about one of the great, consistent threads that runs through all mystical traditions: reincarnation. One of the great occult secrets is the recognition that the personal ego does not exist - it is phoney. We have individual traits but these are better understood to be different aspects (or incarnations) of what Hindus call Brahman - the player of all the parts.

Emerson in his essay 'Nature' (1836) summed up this experience more beautifully than I will ever be able to:
"We return to reason and faith. There I feel that nothing can befall me in life, -- no disgrace, no calamity, (leaving me my eyes,) which nature cannot repair. Standing on the bare ground, -- my head bathed by the blithe air, and uplifted into infinite spaces, -- all mean egotism vanishes. I become a transparent eye-ball; I am nothing; I see all; the currents of the Universal Being circulate through me; I am part or particle of God."

Meister Eckhart was excommunicated by the Catholic Church in 1328 for his 'herecy':
“The eye through which I see God is the same eye through which God sees me; my eye and God's eye are one eye, one seeing, one knowing, one love.”

I've felt for a while that when we feel a strong connection to someone else, even when we may not know them well, it is a connection forged by this unity with all things, and across all time. And is it possible that the love we feel is an echo or harmonic of that relationship from a past (or even future) life? Its an explanation that I like !

So I was on a train this morning, listening to music and pondering these things as I often do when this song came on: Iris by Goo Goo Dolls. According to my iTunes I've owned the song since 2008 and I've listened to it over 50 times but for the first time, this morning, it completely blew me away.

And I'd give up forever to touch you
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now

And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
And sooner or later it's over
I just don't wanna miss you tonight

And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's meant to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in my lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive

And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's meant to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's meant to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's meant to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
*********************************************

Originally released in 1998 it is a classic case of the slow-burn, sleeper, hit song. It certainly passes the all important live test and is currently at #37 in the UK chart having peaked at #5 in recent weeks. Certain of my ugliest prejudices were brought to the fore when I learnt that the reason for this re-emergence was a feature on Britain's Got Talent. You'd have to be very hard-skinned not to be moved by this performance though !

Finally - If you want to know who I am, or who you are, or who anyone is - this book is the best explanation I've found: The Book: On the Taboo Against Knowing Who You Are - By Alan Watts

Tuesday 14 May 2013

Between Angels and Insects - Papa Roach

Hola ! I thought for this post I'd try to expand on one of the themes that emerged from looking more closely at the second verse of the song from the previous post: Halo - Depeche Mode. Those lyrics touched on the aching we have in our hearts (dukkha) and how "all life's luxuries are there for you and me". To me this all resonates with the truism that "the best things in life are free!"

Many songs have expanded on this theme but I've chosen to look at Between Angels & Insects by Papa Roach - as much as anything to tackle a song from a completely different musical genre from those we've covered so far. Rock Music has long had an association with the occult, the mystic and even satanism - there's none of that here you may be glad to hear - just a very raw exposition of the 4 noble truths of buddhism !

****************************************
There's no money, there's no possessions,
Only obsession, I don't need that shit,
Take my money, take my obsession

I just want to be heard, loud and clear are my words,
Coming from within man tell them what you heard,
It's about a revolution, in your heart and in your mind,
'Til you find a conclusion, lost out in obsession,
Diamond rings get you nothing but a life-long lesson,
And your pocketbooks stressing,
You're a slave to the system, working jobs that you hate for that shit you don't need,
It's too bad the world is based on greed,
Step back and see,
Stop thinking about yourself, start thinking aboutâ?¦

There's no money, there's no possession, only
Obsession, I don't need that shit
Take my money, take my possession, take my obsession,
I don't need that shit

Because everything is nothing,
And emptiness isn't everything,
This reality is really just a fucked up dream,
With the flesh and the blood that you call your soul,
Flip it inside out, it's a big black hole,
Take your money burn it up like an asteroid,
Possession, though you're never gonna feel the void,
Take it away and learn your best lesson,
The heart, the soul, the life, the passion

There's no money, there's no possession,
Only obsession, I don't need that shit
Take my money, take my possession, take my obsession,
I don't need that shit

Money, possession, obsession,
Present yourself, press your clothes, comb your hair,
And clock in,
You just can't win, just can't win,
And the things you own, own you
No!

Take my money, take my possession, take my obsession,
I don't need that shit
Fuck your money, fuck your possession, fuck your
Obsession, I don't need that shit
Money, possession, obsession, I don't need that shit
***********************************************

Strictly speaking buddhism isn't a form of mysticism - buddhists are nothing if not extremely practical realists, and you can't say that about many mystics ! But mystics do often pick-up many buddhic tendencies and as the Dalai Lama has said himself  "Don't become a Buddhist. The world doesn't need more buddhists. Do practice compassion. The world needs more compassion!”

Its important to say that as far as I'm aware Papa Roach are not buddhists. However, by some means or other this song absolutely nails the 4 noble truths:
1. People suffer
2. People suffer because they crave
3. People can stop suffering
4. They can stop suffering by following the eightfold path

The eightfold path is: right worldview, right intention, right speech, right action, right livelihood, right effort, right mindfulness and right concentration. As the lyrics above show, Jacoby Shaddix has some work to do on the "right speech" part but unlike Christianity's 10 commandments - the eightfold path is not a set of hard and fast rules. Rather they form the backbone of the "dharma" which in literal sense means  "that which maintains the stability and harmony of the universe", but practically means the "mode of living" to be encouraged.

For anyone that wants to learn more I strongly recommend the following:
Buddhism Plain and Simple - Steve Hagen
Awakening the Buddha Within - Surya Das

There is a huge amount of wisdom in this message:
"No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path."
"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned."
"You will not be punished for your anger (love of money / sins), you will be punished by your anger (love of money / sins)"

I'm not going to analyse the song line by line because for me when viewed through the lense of buddhism the lyrics have no hidden meaning - they are very explicit !

What I will indulge myself to say is that Jacoby is channeling some great philosophers in his lyrics:
"There's no money" ~ "All money is a matter of belief" - Adam Smith
"There's no possessions" ~ "Property is theft" - Pierre-Joseph Proudhon, and others
"Reality is just a fucked up dream" ~ "All that we see or seem, Is but a dream within a dream." Edgar Allan Poe

Much more on dreams to come in future posts . . .

Tuesday 7 May 2013

Halo - Depeche Mode

Morning All - Namaste ! I hope this message finds you in fine form today !

I thought we'd head back in time a little for our next song - and what a classic it is: Halo by Depeche Mode. Originally released on the exceptional Violator album which included other songs of mystical reference such as My Personal Jesus, World in my Eyes, Policy of Truth and Enjoy the Silence, it is an eerie homage to the dukkha we all feel to a greater or lesser extent in our day-to-day existence. Halo was never released as a single but has gained even more of a cult following in recent years due to the exquisite Goldfrapp remix. Listen, enjoy, and we'll be back to look at some of the other songs from this album before too long!

1. You wear guilt
2. Like shackles on your feet
3. Like a halo in reverse
4. I can feel, The discomfort in your seat, And in your head it's worse

5.There's a pain
A famine in your heart
An aching to be free
6.Can't you see
 All love's luxuries, Are here for you and me

7. And when our worlds they fall apart
When the walls come tumbling in
8. Though we may deserve it
It will be worth it

9. Bring your chains
10.Your lips of tragedy
11. And fall into my arms

And when our worlds they fall apart
When the walls come tumbling in
Though we may deserve it
It will be worth it
 
1. "Jesus did not spend a great deal of time discoursing on the trinity, original sin or the incarnation, which have pre-occupied later Christians. He went around doing good and being compassionate" - Karen Armstrong. The whole notion of original (ancestral / Adamic) sin sickens me. Many people in western society feel the weight of that cultural baggage be they religious or not.
2. That burden prevents people from thinking clearly and behaving naturally - it shackles them to a very primitive theology / world view.
3. An inverted (or reversed) Halo would be around the feet - like the aforementioned shackles. A misinterpreted spiritual message of compassion is subverted into guilt - the halo of enlightenement falls from behind the head to get snagged around the feet and impede the spiritual journey.
4. Being born guilty of a species-wide sin against a supernatural paternal deity is bound to make you feel uncomfortable. For those of us without that affliction it is painfully obvious how debilitating it is physically (in your seat) and mentally (in your head) - the two being intrinsically part of a greater whole.
 
5. This guilt, in combination with the fear of this life being a one-chance offer to secure eternal peace or eternal damnation has led many to steer away from the misguided major religions and into a vapid, consumer-centric and ultimately unsatisfying lifestyle. Often this is debt financed leading to debt-serfdom
6. Whereas - when you truly open your eyes - all life's (or love's) luxuries are out there for everyone to enjoy now, if only they knew it! This is the mystical revelation: Union with the divine does not happen later, or in the afterlife, it can happen now. We just need to realise it ! "There is a voice that doesn't use words. Listen" - Rumi
 
7. Breaking free of the bonds of attachment and ego to experience enlightenment can be painful - and very hard. See St John of the Cross "Dark Night of the Soul".
8. But this is necessary to achieve - although ironically all sense of ego-driven achievement will be lost in the process !
 
9. Bring your shackles of guilt and,
10. your monkey-mind which betrays its presence in the things you say and the way you act
11. and put your trust in the loving embrace of the universe - you make the connection !
"So then, when you’re in the way of waking up, and finding out who you really are, what you do is what the whole universe is doing at the place you call here and now. You are something that the whole universe is doing in the same way that a wave is something that the whole ocean is doing… The real you is not a puppet which life pushes around; the real, deep down you is the whole universe.” – Alan Watts